Year-end lists have become the norm. And this year, so have virtual gatherings. Workshops, town halls, classes, conferences, webinars, and more just with the click of a button.

At the start of the pandemic, I wondered what this would mean for my work. I wasn’t alone. In a pinch or a panic, many looked to recreate the same gatherings we had in person now just on a different channel. In many ways, we realized it was now easier for us to come together, especially across geographic distances. 

But while there was certainly lots of innovation and creativity to applaud, many shared stories of organizations that quickly fell into the same gathering traps when we were in person. 

Among the many lessons of 2020 is this: Our needs and frustrations around gathering haven’t really changed. We now have an awareness of the opportunity and the urgency to do better.

Some call it ‘Zoom fatigue’. It’s all too easy to blame technology. So, let’s not.

When we look back at a year of gathering virtually, one trend is clear. The struggle we had with gathering in 2020 was not how to share information but how to connect.

Virtual and in-person gatherings are not the same. They can’t be. But what is the same is what people want -- connection. 

As we look towards a time when we can be in person again it’s not enough to assume we will automatically be more connected. Technology or lack thereof doesn’t propel or fuel connection - it’s us and our choices. 

Here’s how to make a few new ones. And just in time...

The old way: viewing gathering as a panacea → The new way: having clarity on the outcome, what we’re solving for

We don’t fly across the world to look at power points. We do so to become a better manager. We don’t attend a virtual yoga class to do poses. We attend to feel better, or stronger. 

Regardless of the channel or the medium, people want to be moved or changed. People gather for the outcome it produces, not necessarily the gathering, or the content itself. 

When we ‘sell’ a gathering based only on the tool it can become more noise than need. The novelty quickly wears off. Virtual Happy Hours anyone?

The tool of gathering is just a means to an outcome.

Increasing the value of the gathering itself starts with being able to ask and answer: What will be different because of our time together?

Old way: information broker → the new way: connection builder

Lest we forget our employees can likely get the content you’re sharing on their own and read it on their own time. 

Technology is now at our fingertips. The content already was. So is that why we’re bringing people together? 

We gather not just for the message but for the moment. 

We succeed when we bring people not only closer to our message, but to us.

“This is a song about X”, is a phrase live musicians often say before they introduce a song. Heartbreak, family, first loves. This small choice helps bring their material closer to their audience and something they too know or can relate to. It’s no longer their song, it’s ours. 

Our employees are also looking for a connection to the material or message we’re sharing. It’s hard for a message to stick without it. So, we might as well give them an opportunity to do so. 

Old way: blaming the technology when it doesn’t land → the new way: looking at how we bring change to people in the first place

Gatherings are often one of the highest stakes forms of communication. Time, money, prep, people - it all adds up. 

A good portion of that time and prep is spent on what our change will be (the content). What slides will be added to our class? What will our agenda be? Etc.

Yet, often not enough time is spent on how to bring that change to people. How will we help people get from A to B? Why should people care? Why would it stick? What will this mean for our employees? 

What we communicate is often less important than how. This is one reason why two companies can have similar company values with wildly different engagement and adoption.

At the heart of gathering is connecting. Pushing information is just one component. For the gathering to stick we need to pull on people’s sense of ownership and commitment. 

Key takeaways

Though many of us were operating in a context that’s new because of COVID, many of the challenges we had with gathering this year are not. Whether virtual or in person, the questions are the same. We want our gatherings and the change we’re seeking with them to last - no matter if they’re in person or not.

COVID has shown us we want to be together but we also want it to be meaningful. We crave gathering yet it also must be worth it and worth our time. 

In this new year, we can fix gatherings for good by getting better at creating connection and not just content.

Lindsey Caplan is a screenwriter turned organizational psychologist who helps HR & business leaders create experiences that boost motivation, engagement, and performance

Say hello@gatheringeffect.com